Mark Sloniker jazz musician and artist
Mark Sloniker jazz artist and musician

News from 2008

12/30/08

Okay e-friends, just enough time to say thanks for listening in 2008…we had such a fine time (I am so grateful for all our wacky and fun jazz hangs!)…thanks! Now we’re gassing up the jet for a trip to D.C. to request a meager bail out for some poor judgment losses earlier this year when I threw $29 (good money after bad) at a lotto power ball investment which needless to say was a total loss…oh well…my friends in high places say that I’m a shoe in for a bit ‘o the ole bail out bucks and since these funds are doled out, rounded up to the nearest billion…well I’ll have a few extra buck to spread around. Any suggestions???

• Wednesday 12/31 New Year’s Eve at Jay’s Bistro 6-8:30 solo piano, Mark Sloniker/piano Then 9-1 Colleen Crosson/voice, Erik Applegate/bass, Shilo Stroman/drums and Mark (Bailed Out) Sloniker/piano.
• Friday 1/02 Jay’s Bistro presents a special night of jazz with Applegate, Raynes and Sloniker thee original Monster Trux Trio with special guests Mike Davis/guitar and Mandy Harvey/voice.
• Saturday 1/03 Jay’s Bistro features vocalist, Billy Hundley with Roger Barnhart/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano.
• Upcoming: Wednesday 1/7 features Erik Applegate/bass. Thursday 1/8 features John Olson/drums. Friday 1/9 features Ryan Fourt/guitar. Saturday 1/10 features Colleen Crosson/voice. Saturday 1/17 features Mary Buirgy/voice. Saturday 1/24 features Wendy Fopeano/voice.

12/17/08

Authorities continue to give Iraqi shoe thrower a severe tongue lashing and while the assailant admitted he behaved like a real heel, after a bit of soul searching, he still continues to consider Bush his arch enemy. His heel like behavior spiked after being pumped up on athletes foot powder but soon afterward he seemed to be a common loafer and fell in step with a defeatist attitude. “These weapons of “last” (that’s a pun, honest…look it up) destruction have sure got me in a jam” he was quoted as saying while security guards made him toe the line. Another reporter said, “The offense was carried out on a shoestring budget, as penny loafers were used in this cents-less act…where the perpetrator said he was just trying to get his two cents in!” Prosecutors intend to sock it to him (despite holes in their case, darn it) while the defense says he’s a shoe in for a 12 step rehabilitation program (if they can only jog his memory about his getting the boot at his job earlier that day). President Bush was quoted as saying, “After I saw the first one fly by, well I was just waiting for the other shoe to…you know…”

In response to this situation we will be playing the music of Schubert, Schumann and Schroeder, exclusively this week (if the shoe fits)…try us on for size!

• Wednesday 12/17 Jay’s features Derf Green on hand drums and foot tapping, Roger Barnhart on walking bass, Mark Sloniker on twinkle-toe-tinkling- piano with special guest guitarist, Mike (Laced up to fly) Davis (7-10).
• Thursday 12/18 Jay’s Bistro will pump you up with free snow shoe shining and shpecial guesht Shuey Lewish…and Gene Libbea/bass and Mark Shoeniker/piano (and putting his foot in his mouth).
• Friday 12/19 Jay’s features Dave Lunn/sole sax, Roger Barnhart/ankle bass-let, Mark Raynes/sandaless drums and Mark-no-shoes-no-service-Sloniker/piano.
• Saturday 12/20 Jay’s sizes things up with Colleen (in casuals) Crosson/voice, Gene-Loafing-Libbea, on LeBass and Mark-shoe-be-do-be-do-Sloniker/on foot pedals…it behooves you to shoe up for this one.

We’ll be transposing everything two steps up all week end, so wear heels!

Thanks For Listening!

Mark (aka Santa’s Elvis)

12/10/08

Here are 12 of the grainiest groaners I've gregariously groaned at...grateful to my friend N.D. for aiding and abetting this season with sanctimonious silliness. Thanks N.D.! Jazz follows!

1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whiskey maker,but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. No matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
6. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
7. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
8. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
9. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
10. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
11. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
12. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'

• Wednesday 12/10 Jay's Bistro 7-10 jazz starts with monster trux jazz trio (this incarnation [that's a country of drive-by folks] includes Shilo Stroman/drums, Erik Applegate/bass and Mark Sloniker in third person and on piano. At 8pm saxophonist, Andrew Vogt joins in.
• Thursday 12/11 Jay's Bistro features Gene Libbea/bass and Mark Sloniker/past-perfect-and-possessive-plural-piano. Music 7-10:30 sitter inners will be sitting in, by and by.
• Friday 12/12 Jay's Bistro (8:30-11:30) Guitar-man Ryan Fourt, Ben Waters/drums, Marty Kenny/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano preside.
• Saturday 12/13 Jay's presents Billy Hundley/voice with Roger Barnhart/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano.
• Upcoming Saturday 12/20 features Colleen Crosson/voice, Gene Libbea/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano Thanks for Listening!

Mark

12/05/08

In my weekly gig announcement I forgot to let you know about a wonderful concert this Sunday night (7pm) at Avo’s here in Fort Collins. Johnsmith, a fabulous singer-songwriter/guitarist and long time friend of ours will be in concert, and Colleen (Crosson) and I will perform with him. We’re kind of the back up band: Colleen brings her sweet and fine harmonies to John’s tunes, I layer in some keys, and it’s really one of my favorite nights of the year. John’s songs are beautiful stories put to music and his Irish-esque tenor/baritone voice becomes the consummate story teller. We did it last year to a very packed house at Avogadro’s Number and it did a number on all of us present (I think the number was 1). I even debuted my song The Low Tech Blues and my Janice-Joplinesque-Tom-Waittsian voice quite a hoot to boot! Tickets are $17 and are available at Avo’s (605 S. Mason St.), The Finest Cds in Campus West, or Catalyst Coffee (just north of Horsetooth Rd. on Shields). You can sample some of John’s music at http://www.johnsmithmusic.com as always…

Thanks for listening,

Mark M

12/04/08

Two fine quotes, the first from Winston Chuchill who had high regard for the insightfulness of pigs when he said…” Cats look down on all people while dogs tend to worship people but pigs look on people as equals (and acurately so…I might add)” which brings to mind the second quote by the famous Harvard mathimatician turned satirical singer/song writer Tom Leher…who put it rather succinctly when he said “ self indulgence is better than no indulgence at all”…in this time of Thanksgiving I am truly thankful of your indulgence of my waky weekly wordy wanderings. Thanks!

At this point I am to believe that I have EITHER become a rather good speller of words OR that my “spell-check” device has died from over use (abuse) or some other mal function. So at this point I have no choice but to advertently (that’s the opposite of inadvertinently) misspell words in order to ass her tain whether or not spell check met her her untimely demise OR I are the absoloot spelling rooler and in cape a bull of making an air-or………………….WOW, spell check…is dead…spell bound, it’s toste, toe tully burnt…I’ve kilt it! I guess we know that our society is in real trouble when even your spell-check bounces!

The only thing left to do is play music…preferably jazz (which seems to render spell-chaeck inconsonant)! Here’s where…

• Thursday 12/4 Jay’s Bistro 7-10:30 my bass friend Roger Barnhart and I (mark sloniker) hold down the Fort while guests join us for creative cameo camraderie…boy this absence of spell check cuts both weighs…will the letter of the law out-way the spirit of the law?
• Friday 12/5 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) this trumpet guy, Kevin Whalin’ is quite a catch…you’ll be hooked on jazz if you dare to sail these sees…with Mark Raynes/druming up treble, Erik Applegate/bass and bass fishin’ and Mark Sloniker/samon I am…sounds fishy to me…but I blubber on…
• Saturday 12/06 Jay’s Bistro was scheduled to host Wendy Fopeano (who experienced the loss of a family member this last week…please hold our soul sister and her family in prayer for now and she will join us again in January) Mary Buirgy has kindly agreed to step in and with the help of Marty Kenny/ bass we will keep heartful music eminating from this very music friendly bistro. Please join us!
• Upcoming: Wednesday 12/10 features Andrew Vogt/sax w/ Eirk Applegate/bass etc… Friday 12/12 features Ryan Fourt/guitar and Ben Waters/drums! Saturday 12/13 features vocalist Billy Hundley. Saturday 12/20 features Colleen Crosson/voice (she’s spell binding!)!

Thanks for letting me in to your e-world…these are some great gigs, please come down for some great music!

Mark

11/19/08

Perhaps you too have seen adds on the Comedy Channel for a video called “Girls Gone Wild” in which college age gals in a “spring break” like atmosphere are exposing their breasts to the camera for reasons that seem unclear (maybe the reasons were clearer when I was younger) At any rate if you happen to see the NEW video entitled “Piano Players Gone Wild” in which middle aged pianists are mooning the camera for what appears to be no reason and one of them looks like me…it’s NOT…it happens to be my twin brother (evil twin brother that is) Skippy, who appears to be trying to impress the girls gone wild girls with his lunar luminosity (not such a bright idea). Pay no mind to that full moon (I take a dim view of it personally)! Also “Piano Players Gone Wild” lacks plot development, any strong story line and is poorly lit. Oh well…in other jazz news:
• Wednesday 11/19 Jay’s Bistro (7-10) Erik Applegate/bass, Mike Davis/guest guitar and Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker on drums and piano.
• Thursday 11/20 Jay’s (7-10) Kevin Karrick/guitar with Roger Barnhart/bass early and Mark Sloniker/piano late.
• Friday 11/21 Jay’s (8:30-11:30) Peter Sommer/sax, Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano.
• Saturday 1/22 Jay’s (8:30-11:30) Mary Buirgy/vocals, Roger Barnhart/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano.

Happy full moon to all!

Mark

11/12/08

I feel so vindicated! Pumping gas at nearly half the price of last summers “gastritis” outbreak: At this price, if I drive 300% more than I did when gas was expensive I figure I can make back what I lost in July by Christmas…and then some!?$^#*%^! Honk if you love geese!!!

A recent report in “The Jazz Economist” revealed that jazz derives three times as many notes per song as does country & western, folk rock or heavy metal music combined. Jazz listeners derived 40% more satisfaction per jazz set than 80% of other music style consumers. And Jazz listeners derived 78% more pleasure and hence enjoy 49% lighter hearts by listening to that wacky, knucklehead sweet, sincere (none- more-American) music, jazz! Lighter hearts derive more Miles Per Gallon…less weight, ya see…So, derive on down to your nearest authorized jazz emporium for the music that’s good for your heart, your head, your car and your country! Why here’s such a jazz emporium now!

• Wednesday 11/12 (7-10pm) Jay’s (Jazz Emporium) and Bistro: Dr. Forest (No, he really IS a Dr.) Greenough/bass, Kevin Whalen/trumpet, Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker on oil drums and gas powered piano (it has three gas pedals and is tuned to jam)…great heart enlightening jazz for all makes and models!
• Thursday 11/13 (6:30-10:30) Jay’s U-Pump-It Jazz Bistro (a full service station) features Mark (can I check under the hood for you) Sloniker/piano and Gene (I’ll realign your ears for nothin’) Libbea/bass.
• Friday 11/14 Jay’s Bistro (Mark flies solo from 6 until 8) then he cars pools some petrol producing product (no farting around) with Dave Lunn/sax, Matt Smiley/bass and Mark Raynes/oil drums…we guarantee barrels ‘o fun, please and tank-u.
• Saturday 11/15 Jay’s offers a great way to top-off your week with Colleen Crosson/voice, Marty (he never tires of changes and can play a flat to spare) Kenny/bass and “fool-efficient” Mark (“oil get back to you later”) Sloniker as piano player and back seat driver (all the speakers in the back of my car are “back-seat-drivers”). Special feature on “My Fuelish Heart” won’t let anyone come up empty tonight.

Shifting gears to next week: Mike Davis/guitar, Wednesday 11/19. Kevin Karrick/guitar, Thursday 11/20. Peter Sommer/sax, Friday 11/21. Mary Buirgy/voice, Saturday 11/22.

The first 99 heavy hearts will receive a free valve job to get you back into circulation with a lighter heart AND more MPGs with Jazz!

Tanks for Listening!

Mark

11/6/08

“Free at Last! Free at Last!” (With all due respect to Dr. Martin Luther King) I celebrate being free at last, from this l--o--n--g campaign season replete with endless ads of nastiness and squalor! Thank God Almighty, we’re free at last! We will celebrate by grinding “attack ads” into “tactful adulations” and turning lawn signs into “longing for unity”…we will be playing a new kind of blues called the red-white-and-blues (it sounds a little like Yankee Doodle Dandy with a back beat). Here’s where to find us:
• Thursday 11/6 Jay’s Bistro (6:30-10:30) Mark Sloniker plays a piano where the black and white notes have been turned into black-white-red-and-blue notes (it’s not accidental; it’s exponential - the only “key” states here are bliss and ecstasy!). Ron Cottingham joins him with heart felt, honest guitar (no lyre).
• Friday 11/7 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) Andrew “Vogt”/sax joins Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano…four electoral college drop outs, out for an evening of great American jazz!
• Saturday 11/8 Jay’s welcomes Wendy Fopeano wending her way up from Denver with way wonderful wocals to create a most joyful sound, joined by Roger Barnhart/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano.

NEXT WEEK enjoy: Kevin Whalen/trumpet, Wednesday 11/12. Gene Libbea/bass, Thursday 11/13. Colleen Crosson/voice, Saturday 11/15.

Upcoming in November: Erik Applegate/bass, 11/19. Kevin Karrick/guitar, 11/20. Peter Sommer/sax, 11/21. Mary Buirgy/voice, 11/22.

Get down here and catch some “Politically Free” jazz while you can…the 2012 Election Season starts in three weeks! Yikes!

We shall overcome someday….

Thanks for Listening!

Mark

10/29/08

“This” just in from Wall Street: Today's stock market report: Helium was up, feathers were down. Paper was stationary. Fluorescent tubing was dimmed in light trading. Knives were up sharply. Cows steered into a bull market. Pencils lost a few points. Hiking equipment was trailing. Elevators rose, while escalators continued their slow decline. Weights were up in heavy trading. Light switches were off. Mining equipment hit rock bottom. Diapers remain unchanged. Shipping lines stayed at an even keel. The market for raisins dried up. Coca Cola fizzled. (Rocky Mountain News)

I can take stock in a report like that. It certainly rejuvenates my trust in the system! The rising interest in Jazz appears to b a major player in low volume trading of “fours” and “eights” (if you’re not a jazz musician you may not get that one)….but if you come down to Jay’s for jazz, you will get this:
• Wednesday 10/29 (7:00-10:00) Jay’s features Roger Barnhart/bass, with Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker on drums and piano and special guest, Andrew Vogt on sax. This is a very groovy group!
• Thursday 10/30 (6:30-10:30) Mark Sloniker strikes a chord of harmony and fiscal restraint until the bottom drops IN, with the likes of bassist, Dr. Forest Greenough (around 8), when a bond will form between all invested listeners until 10:30, when all live music and live stock will split!
• Friday 10/31 (8:30-11:30) On Halloween, Mark Sloniker and Friends turns into Mark Sloniker and Fiends, and Jay’s Bistro becomes one of everyone’s favorite old haunts. We’ll see if old Hans makes an appearance!
• Saturday 11/01 (8:30-11:30) Guitarist Grant Gordy is fresh off the road from touring with David Grisman, and we will try and make as much music with him as we can until it’s time for him to go back. Matt Smiley plays super fine bass and Mark S. tickles those ivories (honestly, they’re plastic…no pachyderms were harmed in the making of this gig).

Erik Applegate is back with us on Wednesday 11/5 and Friday 11/7. Colleen Crosson is with us Saturday 11/15. Thanks for listening!

Mark

10/22/08

Dear E-Friends (please take stock in this)… Normally I avoid discussing any advice regarding buying or selling of stocks, but I felt this is important enough to share and warn you, since this explosive situation might prove to be yet another ENRON. Please review any holdings you might have in the following stocks: American Can, Interstate Water, National Gas Company, Northern Tissue Company. Due to uncertain market conditions, I advise you to sit tight on your American Can, hold your Water, and let go of your Gas. You may be interested to know that Northern Tissue touched a new bottom today, and millions were wiped clean!

Thanks Dave, for lightening up my heart (with the above “stock report”) around these issues, during such wacky, wacky times! Music can lighten the load too, and this week we offer some fine musical choices to break up all this hub-bub. Whatever you do please “take stock” in creative arts, nature, friends, laughter and family…where a GOOD return is a safe bet for a better week!

• Wednesday 10/22 Jay’s offers low volume, low volatility jazz…so get your nose, ear, and assets off the grindstone and into the Bistro and relax! Guitarist, Mike Davis is our featured guest with Roger Barnhart on bass, Mark Raynes on drums and Mark (me) Sloniker at the piano (7-10PM).
• Thursday 10/23 Jay’s Bistro features Gene Libbea on bass and Mark Sloniker at the piano bringing you a high dividend of pleasure and musical amusement. These two will be digging into Mark’s new, two volume edition of the complete Beatles song book…we are the walrus (koo-koo-katchoo) so join us after your hard day’s night for some strawberry fields with a little help from your friends, Ringo Libbea and Paul McSloniker.
• Friday 10/24 Jay’s welcomes back bass virtuoso, Erik Applegate, drum mystic, Shilo Stoman, guitar guru, Ryan Fourt and pianist (the most carefully pronounced instrumentalist in the band) Mark Sloniker. This is one high yield band! (8:30-11:30)
• Saturday 10/25 Vocal man Billy Hundley returns to the Bistro with Marty Rein’s funky, slappin’ groovin’, walkin’ bass and Mark Sloniker’s accidental piano-ing (all whole notes at half price!) 8:30-11:30).
• THIS Sunday 10/26 (3-6pm): Colleen Crosson and I will be in concert with guitar virtuoso Dave Beegle! This is a benefit for Roger Hoffmann’s campaign for Larimer County Commissioner. Roger is a long time dear and trusted friend of Colleen’s and mine who we think would do a great job in the service of our community. For more information and details regarding this event go to www.hoffmann2008.com or contact Melissa at 669-4307.
• Next week jazz at Jay’s Bistro: Wednesday 10/29 features Andrew Vogt/sax. Friday 10/31 features Dave Lunn & Oscar DeZoto! Saturday 11/1 features Grant Gordy (fresh off the road with David Grissman!).

As always, Thanks for Listening!

Mark

10/08/08

WARNING: the following paragraph contains material shown on TV (all hours of the day) and may not be suitable for anyone with taste or discretion.

Who’da thunk it! That those crafty folks at Viagra would use the financial bailout/rescue to promote their own product. I think that they’re really hitting below the belt with lines like: “We’ve got Thee MOST effective stimulus package for hard times!” or “We’re raising your interest rate for inflation you can count on!” This must be “short selling” at its worst! And of course the disclaimers at the end of the commercials are anything but a soft sell…”For a bull market lasting more that four fiscal quarters call your broker immediately!” or “Consult with your banker to see if you’re healthy enough for hard currency!” OR “if you have ever had liquidity problems or have an aversion to small bills (or a shrinking dollar), then this product may not be suitable for you.”….what is this world coming to anyway!

We’re not going to go there…no way…..

Music is just plain good for morale so stop on by and we’ll lift your spirits (and only your spirits):

• Wednesday 10/08 Jay’s Bistro hosts Marty Kenny/bass, Mark Raynes/drums, Mark Sloniker/piano and special guest Ron Cottingham/guitar. Ron has a masterful touch and draws from guitar greats like Joe Pass, Kenny Burell and Wes Montgomery for a wonderful evening of fine tunes. (7-10)
• Thursday 10/09 Jay’s welcomes back bassist Dr. Forest Greenough with (not a) Dr. Mark Sloniker/piano (7-10:30). Forest is back from his sensational summer of marvelous mountain meandering and raucous river running to walk the bass in his own unique and adventurous way!
• Friday 10/10 Jay’s is the plays to Be (sharp) with trumpeter Kevin (a natural) Whalen, Marty Kenny/bass and Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker/drums, piano (8:30-11:30). Kevin directs the UNC/Greeley Jazz Festival and Marty (who just turned 21) is doing great things in the undergrad program over there.
• Saturday 10/11 Jay’s Bistro features Denver vocalist Wendy Fopeano with Matt Smiley/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano (8:30-10:30).
• Thursday 10/16 Andrew Vogt/sax. Friday 10/17 Bard Hoff/guitar. Saturday 10/18 Colleen Crosson.
• Thursday 10/23 Gene Libbea. Friday 10/24 Ryan Fourt & Erik Applegate. Saturday 10/25 Billy Hundley.

Jazz @ Jay’s is a capital idea!

10/01/08

The results are in (from the National Lexographer’s Word-Off Competition) and this year’s undisputed ONE-WORD-OXYMORON winner IS “monosyllabic”!!!! “Shed” (that “Jekyll and Hide” word, that as a noun means a place for storage BUT as a verb is the ultimate getting rid of) was a close second (no a distant second, no a close second)…while “citation” was both punished and praised for being exemplary AND heinous (all at the same time) that is, according to the letter of the law! Half of those judging the letter of the law were found to be inconsonant while the other half had an untimely vowel movement after having a spell (or would that be misspell) cast on them. Alphabetical disorder broke out and several Dis-Lexicographers were sent in to reverse the spell and sentence the guilty. After which the Nonsensical Poetry competition was cancelled…for no rhyme or reason. If I need a letter of recommendation I am going to pick U. If you join us for some music we will play everything only using only seven letters (or so).

• Wednesday 10/01 Jay’s Bistro features Mary Buirgy starting the evening with us at 7pm for a couple of sets of fine vocals with Roger Barnhart/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and me on piano (music 7-10).
• Thursday 10/02 Jay’s Bistro: Mark Sloniker/piano is joined by and by, by Marty Kenny/bass…several other likely and unlikely guests join in as time goes by (music 7-10:30).
• Friday 10/03 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) Saxophonist Peter Sommer celebrates Fall with Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano. These seasoned veterans spring into a Fall selection of perennial classics…summer better than others.
• Saturday 10/04 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) Mary Buirgy’s back singing more wonderful songs with the likes (what’s not to like) of Gene Libbea/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano.

October continues with featured guests/friends: Ron Cottingham/guitar on Wednesday 10/08. Kevin Whalen/trumpet Friday 10/10. Wendy Fopeano/voice Saturday 10/11. Bard Hoff/guitar Friday 10/17. Colleen Crosson/voice Saturday 10/18. Ryan Fourt/guitar & Erik Applegate/bass Friday 10/24. Billy Hundley Saturday 10/25.

In the meantime, put in a good word for all those dedicated lexographers out there!

Mark

09/25/08

We have just been authorized to bail you out! That’s right, the congress of cosmic muses, sirens, singing angels and symphonic spirits have officially authorized us wacky jazz musicians to bail-you-out-of-any duldrums, dread, dreariness or (dare I say it) depression you may be feeling. We will bail you out with C-notes and G-notes on a humongous Scale (this is no minor event) but a major step to put everyone on our Staff and end this Flat Accidental Movement with A-Sharp rise in volume distribution of billions of notes in your direction. And for every half step you take to work in harmony with us, you will be rewarded with 100 cents of register change (this last sentence is extremely funny if you are an expert in the field of Acoustics or you are a piano tuner).

Remember, Volume distribution is our Forte! Everyone present will receive the same number of C-notes at the same bass rate and an open door policy at the Bistro will reverberate this offer right onto main street (well, at least onto Oak Street). I’ll begin this evening’s music with a Key-Note address and everyone will be making scale in no time (after all, the meter’s running – the bass is walking – and the drummer is rolling in the dough-ray-me). Let’s go for Baroque! I know you can Handel it…after all, there’s no Hayden from it!

• Wednesday 9/24 Jazz Bistro Bail Out Begins (Bar none) 7-10 with Roger-Bailout-Barnhart on bass, Mark “Kick Back” Raynes/drums, Mark “C-Note” Sloniker/truncated-ivory-player and special guest Bard Hoff on EEleven (I mean volume guitar).
• Thursday 9/25 The Bistro is transformed into the huge outdoor festival “Bail-Stock” where sloniker starts things off a-loan (solo, that is) and is joined by bassist, Gene Libbea as they duet (that is, give out more C-notes from evey register and see a sharp rise in volume). Get a strong grip on your volume and you will never be turned down!
• Friday 9/26 Bistro blossoms into a blissful bountiful bevy of bi-partison bailing. Remember if you can bail a friend, then you can Bela Bartok. And the bar talk is turning away from fear, to our “frettless” happy-go-lucky bassist, Matt Smiley (his real name) who will stick his neck our for anyone feeling strung along by this whole note (as it were). Also distrubuting C-notes indiscriminately will be Ryan Fourt/guitar, Mark Raynes/drums and Sloniker/keys (8:30-11:30).
• Saturday 9/27 Bistro will lose no interest as the ever high rated songstress from Denver, Marguerite Juenemann joins Roger (bassman) Barnhart and Mark (C-note Slinger) Sloniker for some finale bailing to end this week economy session (8:30-11:30).

We want to bail-you-out! Mark (Wacky Musician) Sloniker

Mary Buirgy sings Wednesday (10/01) at 7pm and Saturday (10/04) at 8:30. Peter Sommer/sax Friday 10/03. Wendy Fopeano, Sat. 10/11.

09/17/08

HOWDY! What follows our music announcements came to us by way of Colleen’s dad (thanks Dave), who among other things is a cross word puzzle ace and wordsmith extraordinaire (to boot). This is one of my “fave” word-play-grounds and a fabulous bit o’ sharp wit (and we know the pen is mightier than the sword). But first, Live Music and more…

• Wednesday Sept. 17th Jay’s Bistro hosts guest soloist/sax man Andrew Vogt, with Mark Raynes/drums, Marty Kenny/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano. Original compositions as well as jazz perennials will grow on you and fill the air. Please note we have moved our Wednesday jazz time up slightly to 7-10pm.
• Thursday Sept. 18th Jay’s Bistro (7-10) Colleen Crosson will do a very unique solo night of her voice/guitar blend as only she can, bringing a new dimension to the Thursday night thing at Jay’s. Rumor has it she may be joined by a guest or two…
• Thursday Sept. 18th Mark Sloniker will be at Dazzle in Denver (two shows, 7 & 9 pm) with some of Denver’s finest (Paul Romaine/drums, Joe Anderies/sax/flute, Ron Miles/trumpet and Bijoux Barbosa/bass). It’s a bit of a reunion concert, which features original tunes, great standards and rambunctious mischievousness (which is this group’s forte). This is one fine group of cats, ladies and gentlemen! For details and ticket prices go to the Dazzle web site, www.dazzlejazz.com . It looks like the 1st show is close to selling out, so get your tickets soon!
• Friday Sept. 19th Andrew Vogt/sax is back at the Bistro with Sloniker/Raynes/Kenny for more fine Front Range jazz! (8:30-11:30)
• Saturday Sept. 20th Jay’s Bistro features Colleen Crosson, Mark Sloniker and Friends for more musical adventures (8:30-11:30).

Upcoming Bistro Dates: Friday 9/26 features guitarist Ryan Fort. Wednesday 10/1 features vocalist Mary Buirgy. 9/09/08

NEWSFLASH: Jazz performances of the last several weeks have been responsible for the recent cool-down in temperatures leaving some scientists to believe global warming could be contained using a remarkable “cool-jazz-for-cool-cats” strategy. This method has shown that when people listen to cool music (eg. jazz) THEY become cool and or cooler, thus reducing the overall planetary temperature by decreasing the little known, dreaded, Bozone level. This Bozone wipes out our ozone and gets people all riled up because it is primarily a bunch of hot air. Bozone can turn an otherwise sensible group of people into raving Bozonians who clown around trying to put a happy face on certain disaster. Your mission, is to partake of cool jazz and thus lower the overall Bozone layer and replacing it with cool-hip, cool cat demeanor. Why here are some cool-jazz-for-cool-cats opportunities right here…

• Wednesday 9/10 (7-10PM) Jay’s Bistro is “chillin’” with the likes of Roger Barnhart/bass, Mark Raynes/drums, Ron Cottingham/guitar and Sloniker/keys this is a very cool band so FREEZE on over for an ice breaker!
• Thursday 9/11 Jay’s presents Marty Kenny/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano doing a cool job (from 7-10:30) # Friday 9/12 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) trumpeter Kevin Whalen, bassist, Matt Smiley, Raynes/Sloniker on drums/piano are firing up the AC, for the journey.
• Saturday 9/13 (8:30-11:30) Jay’s welcomes Bill Hundley/voice, Roger Barnhart/bass, and Slon-anonanonda with some cool sounds!
• UPCOMING: Wednesday, 9/17 & features Andrew Vogt/sax. Friday 9/19, Andrew Vogt/sax and Colleen Crosson on Saturday 9/20.

Stay Cool!

Mark

8/27/08

All below at Jay’s Bistro except where indicated:
• Wednesday 8/27 (7:30-10:30) Monster Trux Jazz Trio (with the likes of Roger Banhart/bass Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano) lead off, with sax symbol, Andrew Vogt joining them at 8:30. A night of saxational sounds ensues!
• Thursday 8/28 (6:30-10:30) Mark Sloniker leads off with Marty Kenny/bass batting “clean up” and clearing the basses because there’s always room for ‘Cello (you must be at least 43 years old to get that one).
• Friday 8/29 (8:30-11:30) Ryan Fourt on guitar is joined by Matt Smiley (currently a grad student at UNC and a wonderful new addition to the jazz scene) on bass with Mark Raynes on drums and Mark Sloniker at the piano with an unconventional key-note address to raise the bar and adjourn to it!
• Saturday 8/30 (8:30-11:30) Jazz vocalist Marguerite Juenemann joins bassist Mary Kenny and Mark Sloniker at the piano to host a Bistro party in the lounge and another one on the patio (this is the two-party-system at its best) with a special patio appearance by Pattie O’Funiture!

Upcoming Bistro Jazz Features: Gene Libbea, Thurs. 9/4. Peter Sommer, Fri. 9/5. Mary Buirgy, Sat. 9/6. Kevin Whalen, Fri. 9/12. Colleen Crosson, Sat. 9/20.

I’ll be at Dazzle in Denver with Ron Miles, Paul Romaine, Bijou Barbosa, and Joe Anderies on Thurs 9/18 (two shows 7 and 9).

As always, Thanks for Listening!

Mark

8/20/08

We’re celebrating the second Bistrolympics this week with Track and Lounge Events that will leave you hanging on the edge of your bar stool. Although any wavering or body checking there could cost you a tenth of a point if not complete disqualification from the lounge games altogether. Our 100 meter hurdling (as opposed to hurling) event involves jumping over the drums complete with drummer, and bass with bassist before vaulting the piano and piano player over the finish line. The winner gets the gold (Cuervo Gold) and a chance to “poll” vault into the VP spot at the Democratic National Convention next week in Denver. While track attire is recommended, pant suits are optional.

The 12 bar dash involves the pianist, bassist and drummer running to 12 other bars (no rushing) playing a 12 bar blues in each establishment before absconding with 12 of their regulars and bringing them back to the bistro. Any straggling patrons could cost you up to five tenths of a point (plus half that patrons current bar tab). We’re trying to improve last year’s time of 59 minutes 26.4457 seconds and really raise the bar this year.

The competition between our fine upstanding bistro lounge and that low down “Drunken Monkey” across the street will be called The Uneven Bars (event) and in the event of a tie, the bar with the most ties will win.

Any Questions? Then let the games begin!

• Wednesday 8/20 Jay’s (7:30-10:30) Olympiads include Marty Kenny/bass, Ron Cottingham/guitar, Mark Raynes/drums and Mary Lou Sloniker/piano and tumbling (always to a new level of lowness)
• Thursday 8/21 Jay’s (6:30-10:30) includes Beach Jazz with Sandy Sloniker/piano and Marty Kenny/surf bass, others may join in later.
• Friday 8/22 Jay’s (6-8 = a Slon Solo Set) then 8:30-11:30 features the Javelin Event with Team-Bistro: Dave Lunn/sax, Erik Applegate/bass, Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker on drums and piano…Sloniker is the Javelin Catcher on the team and says “boy, can these guys really get their point across, and make an impression on/in me.
• Saturday 8/23 Jay’s (6-8 is a Slon solo set) then 8:30-11:30 features Colleen Crosson/voice, Marty Kenny/bass and Mark Sloniker/meddling in everyone’s lounge games.

May the best WoMan (a new politically correct, intergenderous term including, but not limited to, both genders) WIN!

Mark

P.S. I’ll be performing at Dazzle in Denver on Thursday September 18th (shows at 7 and 9) with Ron Miles/trumpet, Paul Romaine/drums, Joe Anderies/sax, and Bijoux Barbosa/bass for more info contact me or Dazzle.

8/13/08

Last Notice: CSU Lagoon Series Concert TONIGHT 6:30-8:30 (one block south of Laurel and Loomis) Hugh Ragin/trumpet, Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano.
• Thursday Jay’s Bisrto (7-10:30) Mark Sloniker/piano and Marty Kenny/bass and some special guests.
• Friday Jay’s Bisrto (8:30-11:30) John Olson/drums, Andrew Vogt/sax, Marty Kenny/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano
• Saturday Jay’s (8:30-11:30) Wendy Fopeano/voice, Marty Kenny/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano.

8/08/08

# Wednesday August 13th at the CSU Lagoon (one block south of Laurel and Loomis on the CSU campus) 6:30-8:30 with Hugh Ragin/trumpet, Mark Raynes/drums, Erik Applegate/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano. This is a free concert in a beautiful and spacious setting (my favorite) with trees and grass and cloudless skies above. Bring a blanket or lawn chair(s) and relax and enjoy some music! For more information, go to “Summer Lagoon Concert Series at CSU” or “The Mantooth Company” on the internet. This is a great chance to catch trumpeter Hugh Ragin in a rare Fort Collins performance as we celebrate 24 years of playing together!

Here’s the “repeat”:
1 tube of #30 sunblock sun tan lotion: $3.95
1 boogie board: $29.95
1 afternoon at the Jersey shore with your daughter in 90 degree air and 61 degree ocean water (ooowweeeeee)…..body surfing and boogie boarding… Once you’re in…and feeling the might of the surf and the taste of salt, there’s no exit…until 6pm when Poseidon turns off the wave machine for the day and heads to the Surf ‘n Brew for a cold one: PRICELESS
2 gallons of gas (for the drive from Manasquan to Red Bank): $8.00
2 lattes and a 2 iced mochas at the coffee shop: $10.50
1 trip (a pilgrimage, actually) with Myles, Emma and our Jersey guide, Eddie (thanks Eddie, You Rock Man!) to Jay and Silent Bob’s Secret Stash – thee store for memorabilia and collectables with special focus on such movies by Kevin Smith such as “Clerks”, “Clerks II”, “Mallrats”, “Chasing Amy” and “Dogma”: PRICELESS!
1 drive down to the Point Pleasant Boardwalk Amusement Park: $4.00
2 tickets to the bumber car ride (Emma and me): $12.80
1 chance to bump into numerous friends and new acquaintances and run into so many kind folks: PriceLess!!! A glass of wine at Jay’s: $6.50
A dessert at Jay’s: $5.50
A set or two of very unique jazz performed from the heart by some consummate cats: PRICELESS

Here’s your chance to catch some priceless musical fun at Jay’s Bistro!
• Wednesday (8/6) (7:30-10:30) Jay’s features Mark Raynes/drums, Roger Barnhart/bass, Mark Sloniker/piano and Andrew on sax etc…
• Thursday (8/7) (6:30-10:30) Gene Libbea/ bass with Mark Sloniker/piano and guests.
• Friday 8/8 (8:30-11:30) Kevin Whalen/trumpet, Matt Smiley/bass, Shilo Stroman/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano
• Saturday (8:30-10:30) with vocalist Mary Buirgy and Bassist Marty Kenney/bass

As always, thanks for listening!

Mark

8/05/08

1 tube of #30 sunblock sun tan lotion: $3.95
1 boogie board: $29.95
1 afternoon at the Jersey shore with your daughter in 90 degree air and 60 degree ocean water (ooowweeeeee)…..body surfing and boogie boarding… Once you’re in…and feeling the might of the surf and the taste of salt there’s no exit…until 6pm when Poseidon turns off the wave machine for the day and heads to the Surf ‘n Brew for a cold one: PRICELESS

3 gallons of gas (for the drive from Manasquan to Red Bank): $12.00
2 lattes and a 2 iced mochas at the coffee shop: $10.50
1 trip (a pilgrimage, actually) with Myles, Emma and our Jersey guide, Eddie (thanks Eddie, You Rock Man!) to Jay and Silent Bob’s Secret Stash – thee store for memorabilia and collectables with special focus on such movies by Kevin Smith such as “Clerks”, “Clerks II”, “Mallrats”, “Chasing Amy” and “Dogma”: PRICELESS!

1 drive down to the Board Walk Amusement Park: $14.00
2 tickets to the bumber car ride (Emma and me): $13.85
1 chance to bump into numerous friends and new acquaintances and run into so many kind folks: PriceLess!!!

A glass of wine at Jay’s: $6.50
A desert at Jay’s: $5.50
A set of very unique jazz performed from the heart by consummate musicians: PRICELESS

Here’s your chance:
• Wednesday (7:30-10:30) Jay’s features Mark Raynes/drums, Roger Barnhart/bass, Mark Sloniker/piano and Andrew on sax etc…
• Thursday (6:30-10:30) Gene Libbea/ bass with Mark Sloniker/piano and guests.
• Saturday (8:30-10:30) with vocalist Mary Buirgy and Bassist Marty Kenney/bass

8/01/08

Dear jazz/music friends, This planet is currently offering several (out-of-this-world) sweet beboportunities to catch some delightfully “cool vibrations” (jazz-jargon for “lively music” – must be wearing a jaunty beret while using such jazz-speak-ease-lingo…or having a bitchin’ set o’ bongos with which to bombastically celebrate the “beat”!?). I know what busy cats you are, so I will cut to the chase-so-to-speak. Suffice it to say that I am blessed and fortunate to be a part of the following events with the following “Music Doctors” (hence to abbr. M.D.) so please, “Carpe these beboportunities” and song full loonities and pop on out for some toonage…soonage… (you know this universe as-we-know-it, has only got another 14 or 15 billion good years left in her - or not…rumor has it the extended warranty on the Milky Way Galaxy expired yesterday). These mysterious Music Doctors can bring a healing to how you feeling…Or whimsically ‘splain away your pain…Or bring a serene sane coolery to this heated global foolery. Whatever the spasm, the razzle dazz of jazz can ford THAT chasm. If you got a mope, don’t call the Pope for these jazz Drs. can ascend any slippery slope. So just dawn on your “cazh” summer finery…you be the grape…we’ll be the winery! (No pressing matters here!)

Jay’s Bistro Gigs:
• Tonight, Friday 8/1 (8:30-11:30) Ryan Fourt/guitar, Marty Kenny/bass, Raynes & Sloniker/drums & piano. This is thee very same band that brought down the house (well, actually it wasn’t in a house; it was in a square…BUT by the time we got done with it, it wasn’t “square” anymore, it was very hip. Tonight we’ll be playing in the round!
• Saturday 8/2 (8:30-11:30) Billy Hundley sings the way ONLY Billy Hundley can sing. And oh, can he sing! Carpe Billy Hundley and give him a good listening (to?). Bassist Marty Rein will walk the “line” (bass line that is) and make that bass talk (the talk)! I feel better just talking about it. I’ll attempt the piano (pray for me).
• Avogadro’s Number: Sunday 8/3 Colleen Crosson and Mark Sloniker team up for a very rare concert appearance at Avo’s Outdoor backyard arena (7PM). People are already lining up with lawn chairs and sleeping bags at the entrance (or not). This will be a sweet night of lovely songs from original compositions to jazzy standards to fine folkery with a little tom foolery thrown in for good measure (bar none) ($10 at the door)!
• Summer Lagoon Concert (at CSU Lagoon): Wednesday 8/13 (6:30-8:30) HUGH RAGIN HUGH RAGIN HUGH RAGIN!!!!!!!!! Teams up with THEE MONSTER TRUX MONSTER TRUX MONSTER TRUX T-R-I-O (that’s Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano) to bring a sensational set of toonage to my favorite outdoor concert setting in the galaxy…and I’ve played them all…except for that one little coffee shop on the far side of Pluto…where I’ll be next week…Pluto’s got NO atmosphere but it’s cool…very cool! This is a rare Fort C. appearance for Hugh and we will celebrate 24 years of playing (and I do mean playing) together this summer!

Stay cool! And as always, thanks for listening!

Mark

7/16/08

Thanks to so many of YOU who were able to attend our set at the Fort Collins Jazz Experience on Saturday! It was one of THEE best sets of jazz I have ever had the good fortune to partake in with band-cats and listener-cats alike (with improvisational music, everyone present is part of the co-creational process). AND, what a perfectly beautiful summer day in which to celebrate and cocreate jazz of many, many flavors, outdoors in thee-so-very-wonderful setting of Old Town, where music was going on, on three stages at once! Thank You, Thank You, Thank You for your ebullient presence in our ever evolving music!

Some of the things I love about jazz are: it’s “extemporaneous” life-affirming willingness to be created in the moment (this is a willingness that requires courage and conviction, an ingredient greatly valued by such deep and innovative thinkers as Thomas Edison and George Washington Carver); it’s inclusivity and love of diversity and variety (like it’s birth place which has been called a “melting pot”…honoring the many paths that lead to the one!); and it’s exuberence and vigor in celebrating the joy of being alive (however tenuous it may appear to be from time to time!).

Jazz (described by documentary film maker, Ken Burns, as “America’s” most significant artistic contribution to the world thus far) is singing to me in this very instant. And it’s song is saying that our current situation is not a doldrum nor a dilemma but an opportunity to respond to the moment in the moment with wisdom and convicton and strength and common sense and good humor and gregarity and humility which can unite ALL lovers of liberty and self determination and freedom ALL around the world. This is a time for these like minded hearts and souls to reach across aisles and borders and rivers and oceans with open hands, eager to paint a Bigger picture; a new picture that is even more life-affirming, planet-affirming and harmony-affirming….humanity- affirming than ever before! My wise and wonderful mamma always said that every challenge was an opportunity in disguise, beckoning us forward to grow. Let’s sieze this one and turn it UP-SIDE-DOWN….ready, on “hike-double-three”….and I will be painting with my eager hands and brushes (the piano) at these places and times…please join me when and where you can.

• Wednesday 7/16 (7:30-10:30) Jay’s Bistro is the canvas for Marty Kenny/bass, Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker and special guest Mathew Floyd/sax as they join hands in a finger painting of joyful sound (this gives digital music a whole new meaning)! The sound of two feet tapping – one hand clapping and no one rapping (at least any angry words).
• Thursday 7/17 Violinist (things bowed well for violinists) James Anderson joins me (Mark Sloniker) at Jay’s for an adventurous romp in the realms of “reel book” revelry. Rwhy ron’t rou rome ron rown! (the three “Rs” have never been so insulted). The details are sketchy but the hand writing’s on the wall…we’ll pencil you in!
• Friday 7/18 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) Fort Collins own Sax symbol, Andrew Vogt serenades us sensationally (if not somewhat sensually) along side Dr. Forest Greenough/Dr. of Bassology, Mark Raynes/Dr. of Drumology and Mark Sloniker/not-a-Dr.-of anything-ology (but he sure can nurse a drink).
• Saturday 7/19 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) Vocalist, Mary Buirgy, guitarist, Ryan Fourt and bassist, Forest Greenough will wow you…all you who are wisely willing to be wowed willingly…and why wait!
• More upcoming jazz @ jay’s features: Bard Hoff/guitar Wednesday 7/23! Ryan Marvel/piano Thursday 7/24! Peter Sommer/sax Friday 7/25! James Anderson/violin Saturday 7/26…after which James is heading to London for graduate school…so please come down and send him off across the pond in style.

ALSO: Sunday, August 3rd, Colleen Crosson and I will be doing a concert in the very cool backyard of Avogadro’s Number (605 S. Mason St., Fort Collins) on the very cool “mini-Telluride-esque” stage in that aforementioned very cool backyard! We will be mixing it up with jazz, contemporary folk and original Sloniker “heartsongs” that perhaps few of you on this list have heard before! The concert starts at 7 pm (it’s a “work night” for some folks and we respect that), and admission is $10 at the door. Come out and “play” with us – it’s all ages, kid friendly with a tree house and everything!

AND Wednesday, August 13, Mark Sloniker and Friends will be making some joyful jazz at the CSU Lagoon Concert Series (6:30-8:30). This is a wonderful location to sit on the grass surrounded by beautiful trees and enjoy some tunes. Bring a picnic and we will paint a sweet summer soundscape for your ears! Google “Lagoon Summer Concerts” for more information regarding this and other Lagoon Concerts this summer.

As Always, Thanks for listening (it’s a joy and honor to play for you)!

Mark

7/09/08

Such a great chance to experience a myriad of jazz this week, could be called a…BEBOPPORTUNITY! JAZZ @ Jay’s during the Fort Collins Jazz Experience starts NOW…well tonight:
• Wednesday 7/9 Jay’s (7:30-10:30) with Ryan Fort/guitar, Mark Raynes/drums, Marty Kenny/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano this is a preview set of our outdoor set on Saturday. Since we never play the same tune the same way twice, stop in and hear what we sound like playing more-inside jazz. We will be playing my latest composition…”An Aire on Conditioning” in the “Cool Jazz” style…so come by and chill with us! (go ahead, give us “the cold shoulder”)
• Thursday 7/10 (7:30-10:30) Jay’s welcomes long time local jazz luminary, Ron Cottingham/guitar with long time local dare-ee-airy, Mark (no-butts-about-it) Sloniker/piano…Batman and Robin ‘got nuthin’ on this Dynamic Duo!
• Friday 7/11 (8:30-11:30) Jay’s features dos Grammy award winner Gene Libbea on bass with Ryan Fort/guitar, Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano. This band swings like a tire tied over a the branch of a huge Cottonwood on the banks of a cool, fast running river. Or something like that.
• Saturday 7/12 Old Town Square (4:30-5:30) Mark Sloniker & Friends (that’s Ryan Fort/guitar, Marty Kenny/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and your humble narrator on piano) this Promises to be a very sweet set so set your sweet sights on the Square and come on down for a listen!
• Later Saturday we will be back at Jay’s @ 9PM with a jammin’ set to finish off the day with some special guests sitting in (bring your axe)

There’s something about Live Music, Summer Sun and Fun that makes this week a wonderful bebopportunity to enjoy our community, so we hope to see your smiling face somewhere along the way!

As always, Thanks for Listening!

Mark

Q: What’s the difference between a large pizza and a jazz piano player?
A: A large pizza can feed a family of four! J (cheesy as it sounds)

7/04/08

One DVD of Studio Ghibli’s film “Spirited Away”… $29.95
One lap top computer…$1,499.95
One Sunday evening with my daughter Emma, building a fabulous pillow-card table-blanket-fort on our deck (complete with star-gazer-sky-light-flap through which one could view any and everything worth seeing in the entire milky way galaxy [“explain to me again how it resembles a candy bar”] while watching said movie on said lap top, while eating perfectly popped pop corn, while hearing Emma say…”Were you making up the part about the black hole 3 million times the mass of the sun at the center of our galaxy?” and responding…”No, well give-or-take 100 million or say, that’s what they say!? Did you see that falling star just now?” ……………………………………………….PRICELESS!!!

Dr. Dan Gilbert (of Harvard) says that experiences are “better” than things because we will always have them. Right on Dr. Dan! Well, as experiences go, here’s another priceless one (for me, at least):
• Saturday 7/5 (8:30-11:30) Jay’s Bistro will be serving up some jazz (PBS film maker Ken Burns called jazz the most sigificant American* artistic contribution to the world thus far) with the likes of vocalist Colleen Crosson, bassist Marty Kenny and me on the piano. We will play a medley of some of my favorite patriotic songs from the American* patriotic songbook, with a uniquely American* jazz flavor!....

One beer…$3.50 (approx.)
One seafood Ceasar salad… $10.00 (approx.)
One truly inspired, heart felt jazzed up patriotic medley…priceless (precisely)
Happy 4th of July to ALL! God bless America, planet Earth, the rest of the Milky Way Galaxy (even the black hole)…. oh yeah, and those other galaxies out there too!…How did Tiny Tim put it?

Thanks (as always) for Listening,
Mark

*The use of the word American here refers to the United States of America.

PS Mark Sloniker & Friends will perform at the Fort Collins Jazz Experience on Saturday July 12 at 4:30PM on the Old Town Square Stage (and later that night at Jay’s Bistro. For more information please go to: http://www.downtownfortcollins.com

6/30/08

Dear E-Mail friends. This letter comes right from the top (hum "Hail To The Chief" wistfully while reading). m.s.

My Fellow Americans.. I have in my possession, the ONLY patriotically-ethically-morally-spiritually-and intelligently proper and approved method for correctly spending your IRS Rebate Check. It is there below. Watch out! It is tricky! It can be dangerous! But I am convinced it is the only way to save America (when I say America, I hope you know that I am referring to the United States and NOT Mexico, Brazil, Canada, Argentina or any other of the other western hemisphere nations that in totality make up "the Americas," NOR am I addressing any of the citizens of those countries who, by definition ARE AMERICANS and DO have just as much right to refer to themselves as Americans as do we. I was just doing that all these years to see if you were paying attention! You are SO-NOT paying attention. By the way, Laura and I went out last weekend and tried the method explained below (we bought a composting bin from Tipper and Al). We’re making new American soil as we speak (not Brazilian nor Canadian nor Mexican soil, mind you -- this here New soil is American!)

Yours TRULY! G.W.B. (you can stop humming now)

How to use Your IRS Rebate check...

As you may have heard, each of us will be getting a tax rebate check to stimulate the economy. If we spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China. If we spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs. If we purchase a computer it will go to India. If we purchase fruits and vegetables it will go to Honduras and Guatemala. If we purchase a good car it will go to Japan. If we purchase useless stuff it will go to Taiwan and none of it will help the American economy. We need to keep that money here in America. The only way to keep that money here at home is to spend it at yard sales since those are the only businesses left owned by Americans!! ONE other very American place to spend your check is at establishments where jazz (the only real American Music) is played. You could buy micro-brews…that’s beer brewed by American-micro-brew-beer-brewers OR American Wine, made by American Whiners (there’s no shortage of them these days). Why there’s a Jazz Establishment (aka Jay’s Bistro) Now!

• Tonight (Wed.) 6/23 (7:30) Monster Trux Jazz Trio with special guest Andrew Vogt/sax.
• Thursday 6/24 (6:30-10:30) American Guitarist Ron Cottingham and Legal Alien (from planet Zolton) Pianist, Mark Sloniker…exercising his inalienable rights (and lefts)…
• Friday 6/25 (8:30) Guitarist Ryan Fourt with Raynes/Sloniker and Matt Smiley/bass - they play a mean “Stars and Stripes Forever”
• Saturday 6/26 (8:30) Vocalist Marguerite Juenemann with Roger Barnhart/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano

Remember: Yard sales and Jazz AND God Bless America!

Mark

6/18/08

There are some wonderful musicians appearing at Jay’s Bistro this week. I cordially invite you to catch some great music if you can and stop on by.
• Wednesday 6/18 (7:30-10:30) Erik Applegate/bass, Shilo Stroman/drums, Mark Sloniker/piano and special guest Kevin Whalen/trumpet…this will be a lot of fun and some excellent music.
• Thursday 6/19 (7:30-10:30) James Anderson/violin and Mark Sloniker/piano…this is a suite duet if ever there was one (I mean two)…check us out! We had so much fun the last time we had to duet again.
• Friday 6/20 (8:30-11:30) Sax man Dave Lunn joins the MONSTER TRUX TRIO (Applegate, Stroman & Sloniker) for some jazz with sax appeal.
• Saturday 6/21 (8:30-11:30) Denver Songstress Wendy Fopeano wends our way…with Marty Kenny/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano

UPCOMING: Wednesday 6/25 features Andrew Vogt/sax. Friday 6/27 features Ryan Fourt/guitar. Saturday 6/28 Marguerite Juenemann/voice. Come on down and check out some cool jazz at the Bistro! As always, Thanks for Listening!

Mark

6/3/08

We caught Chick Corea, Stanley Clark, Lenny White and Al Demiola last night at the Paramount in Denver. What a wonderful concert and a bit of “a rite of passage” to share this band with my son, Myles. The first time I caught RTF (Return to Forever) was in the late 70s when I was living in Santa Barbara, CA…that was a different incarnation of RTF but fabulous as well. Next time I saw Chick was at the Hollywood Bowl ’79 with Herbie Hancock – two grand pianos two amazing jazz pianists (that was it) and a very different AND fabulous concert as well. Then I saw Chick again in the early 80s at Mackie Auditorium in Boulder with Gary Burton. Vibes and Piano Duo totally different from either of the other gigs JUST as brilliant just as amazing. Last night was my first Demiola, White, Clark and Corea concert and again what a wonderful and unique night of music. Chick has been one of my favorite pianists over the years (at one point 7 out of every 10 records [that’s right vinyl] I put on the player was one of his). So in the middle of the concert my son leans over to me and says “that lick he just played sounds like you and those chords do to and I can see that this guy has really influenced your playing dad. Wow these cats are amazing!”

Concert tickets: $80
Pretzel and 2 bottled waters: $12
Hearing your son say that (above): PRICELESS!

I’ll be playing some music (that sounds like I listened to a lot of Chick records over the years) with some amazing cats at the some cool spots real soon!

• Wednesday (tonight) 6/4 Jay’s Bistro (7:30-10:30) with Mark Raynes/drums, Roger Barnhart/bass, Ron Cottingham/guitar, Mark Sloniker/piano and special guest, Justin Thyme/reeds. This band will groove and swing to your heart’s delight!
• Thursday 6/5 (6:30-10:30) Jay’s Bistro: Gene Libbea (two time Grammy award winning bassist) with Mark Sloniker (awarded “best piano player in three generations” by his Grannie)! Priceless!
• Friday 6/6 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) A fine jazz quartet comprised of Peter Sommer/sax, Erik Applegate/bass and Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker/drums & piano. This group plays quite a few cool original tunes as well as great jazz standards.
• Saturday 6/7 Jay’s (8:30-11:30): Soulful Song Stylist Billy Hundley sings with Marty Rein on bass and Mark Sloniker at the keys.

Come on down and we will create a priceless moment (or two) of music and merriment! Upcoming: Friday 6/13 trumpeter, Kevin Whalen. Saturday 6/14 vocalist, Colleen Crosson. Thursday 6/19 violinist, James Anderson. Saturday 6/21 vocalist, Wendy Fopeano.

5/21/08

Okay, first jazz line-up…then bad puns.
• Wednesday 5/21 (7:30-10:30) Jay’s Bistro: Gene Libbea/bass, Mark Raynes/drums, Mark Sloniker/piano with special guest Andrew Vogt/sax
• Thursday 5/22 (7-10:30) Jay’s Bistro Ron Cottingham/guitar and Mark Sloniker/piano
• Friday 5/23 (8:30-11:30) Jay’s features Dave Lunn/sax, Roger Barnhart/bass, Mark(s) Raynes & Sloniker/drums & piano
• Saturday 5/24 Jay’s (8:30-11:30) Mary Buirgy/voice. Roger Barnhart/bass and moi

Unfortunately, do to some personnel and logistical dilemmas we have been forced to cancel the June 1st Concert at Jay’s Bistro. If you have already sent me a check for tickets, I will write “void” all over it and send it back to you. Sorry for the change of plans. We hope to reschedule at a later time. So, NO concert 6/1 but YES, live jazz this week at Jay’s Wednesday through Saturday!

Thanks for Listening,

Mark

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
Police were called to a day care where a 3-yr-old was resisting a rest.
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now.
The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.
The short fortune teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
A thief who stole a calendar got 12 months.
A thief fell & broke his leg in wet cement. He became a hardened criminal.
When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U.C.L.A.
The dead batteries were given out free of charge.
A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired.
Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
A backward poet writes inverse.
In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.
A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.
If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.
Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft & I'll show you A-flat miner..
The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.
A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France, resulted in Linoleum Blownapart.
You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it.
A calendar's days are numbered.
A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine. ('Taint none of it mine lately!!)
A boiled egg is hard to beat.
He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.
When you've seen one shopping center, you've seen a mall.
When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye.
Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses.
Acupuncture: a jab well done.

5/16/08

Good news regarding our June 1st Sunday Afternoon at the Bistro Concert! Trumpeter Extraordinaire Hugh Ragin will be on the roster, along with The Monster Trux Trio (Mark Raynes/drums, Mark Sloniker/piano). I know the word trio means three, and that third is usually Erik Applegate/bass. It looks as though Erik has another engagement at that time, but is working on connecting us with one of his cohorts at the jazz studies program at UNC. In any event, I can promise you a very inspired set (two sets!) of fine listening jazz in an intimate and casual (and quiet/listening) environment. The music will be superb, and Hugh, because of his busy schedule, hasn’t been able to perform in the Fort for quite a while (so it’s especially exciting to be able to create some inspired toonage with him on this occasion. Tickets are on sale through me or through our concert-care-taker Philip Coggon philipcoggon@comcast.com (Philip has been “instrumental” in supporting this idea…Thanks Philip!). The cost is $15 and they are limited and already going out the door. You will need to make advanced reservations by e-mailing Philip or me, and then sending a check to either of us at the addresses below (You can also get them from me while we’re at the Bistro Wed. through Saturday Nights). There will be a cash bar (hopefully with some light munchies available). I hope you can join us for this new-fun-and-different way to catch some inspired jazz in the Fort! As always thanks for listening!

Mark Sloniker
PO Box 633
Fort Collins, CO 80524
970-484-9600
Philip Coggon
7040 E. CR 56
Fort Collins, CO 80524

5/13/08

You know the difference between musicians and municipal bonds don’t you? Municipal bonds mature…and make money! Okay, Okay! Supposedly, the Muse were Zeus’ nine daughters whose job it was to inspire humans in the areas of art and science (and kick butt on the baseball diamond in their off hours and between their musings). It was art and science’s job to make people’s lives and governments more tolerable during their stay in this world.

In-as-much: the Dahli Lama once said, “there is no need for complicated philosophies or fancy temples. Our own hearts are our temples; the philosophy is kindness. A few unfancy temples will be conjuring up the music (muse zic) of a simple philosophy (as best they can) at the following times and locations (strictly for your amusement):

• Wednesday 5/14 Jay’s Bistro (7:30-10:30) (Thee Original) Monster Trux Trio (Erik Applegate/Mark Raynes/Mark Sloniker) with special guest Justin Thyme (not his real name) but you have seen him wrestle on TV under his wrestling name Giant Stepper. Justin will take on the entire trio (tag team style) in 12 rounds of “Row, Row, Row Your Boat” over the changes of “Maiden Voyage”…winner take all! Didn’t the Greeks invent Saturday afternoon TV wrestling?
• Thursday 5/15 Jay’s Bistro (7-10:30) Violinist James Anderson is back by popular demand with Mark Sloniker/piano. This dynamic duo will play jazz hits that you’ll go a little batty over (even though they’re just winging it)…a fly-by-night-operation if you’ve ever seen one. No bats will be hurt in the making of this music.
• Friday 5/16 Jay’s Bistro sees/hears the return of sax sensation Peter Sommer with that zany Monster Trux Trio (Applegate/Raynes/Sloniker). This is one fine combo (no holds bard [which is a Greek story teller that pulls no punches]) and a great night for jazz AND aMusement! (8:30-11:30)
• Saturday 5/17 Jay’s Bistro presents Guitarist Grant Gordy, (who has been performing with bluegrass great David Grisman) and Mark Sloniker/piano with bass man S.O. Teric, who happens to be one artsy cat (which is a mews related to the other muse)! (8:30-11:30)
• Upcoming: Saturday 5/24 Mary Buirgy/voice. Friday 5/30 Ryan Fourt/guitar. Saturday 5/31 Wendy Fopeano.

ALSO: A very special listening concert will be taking place at Jay’s Bistro on Sunday June 1st at 3pm. It will feature a special edition of the Monster Trux Trio and a very special out of this world (or at least out of town) guest!!! For tickets and/or more information please go to Philip Coggon at philipcoggon@hotmail.com.

Thanks for listening!

Mark

4/22/08

It was great to see so many of you out at the Taste last Thursday at the Hilton. I heard a “tasty” (as opposed to nasty) rumor that ticket sales approached 500 and that we may have raised $100,000 or more on the event (the numbers are still coming in from the silent auction etc.). Our friends at Neighbor to Neighbor and the Larimer County Food Bank (two such wonderful orgs.) were very happy with the turn out. This was Taste #13 for me and I think I may have hit over 49% of the right notes during our three and a half hour set of continuous tunes…with numbers like that, I could be the next president! Thanks to Colleen Crosson, Chuck Landgraf, Oscar DeZoto, Ron Cottingham, Roger Barnhart and Gene Libbea for giving their time and talent to this event.

On to more tasty tunes for music munching and song savoring…
• Wednesday 4/23 (7:30-10:30) Jay’s forays the Monster Trux Jazz Trio (Raynes/Sloniker and Roger Barnhart) with saxophonist Andrew Vogt joining us at 8:30.
• Thursday 4/24 Jay’s plays host to Ron Cottingham/guitar and Mark Sloniker/piano (7:30-10:30)
• Friday 4/25 Jay’s stays jazzy (no delays) with Dave Lunn/sax, Mark Raynes/drums, Roger Barnhart/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano (8:30-11:30)
• Saturday 4/26 Jay’s is the plays to phase in the ways of arrays of the dazed blazed crazes! Okays? Wendy Fopeano/voice, Cliff Notes/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano. Everyone gets a litter ration for the event!

T(h)anks!

Mark

4/9/2008

The proper term for folks getting that gloomy mood when the darkness and cold of winter becomes too much, would be “seasonal depression”. The term that applies to this time of year when Colorado has a winter storm warning out and winter has been over (finito, done, “ciaos-ville”) for almost three weeks…but is making one, in a series of last ditch attempts at spoiling my spring…now the proper term for that is “Seasonal Exasperation”. I mean, enough already! Oh well, if we DO get the 8 inches of snow tonight, then snow-person building contests and hot toddies will be happening on the patio at the Bistro between sets. And during sets, we will play the hottest bloomin’ jazz that’ll make you think you’re in the tropics…bathing suits optional…

• Wednesday 4/9 Jay’s Bistro features sweltering hot jazz (7:30-10:30) with Ron Cottingham/guitar, Marty Kenny/bass, Mark(s) Raynes and Sloniker drums and keys. Wear your oven mitts.
• Thursday 4/10 Jay’s Boiling Hot Bistro Jazz (7-10:30) with Gene Libbea/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano…if you can’t stand the heat, then get out of the Bistro!
• Friday 4/11 Jay’s Jumpin’ Jazz Jacuzzi (8:30-11:30) with Ryan Fourt/guitar, Marty Kenny/bass, Chuck Landgraf/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano…if they played any hotter, we could boil water.
• Saturday 4/12 Jay’s Snow Melting Bistro welcomes Colleen Crosson/cookin’ vocals, Roger Barnhart/burnin’ bass and Mark Sloniker/hot pepper piano. These cats are all steamed up and turning up the heat to boot (8:30-11:30).
• Next Week: Kevin Whalen/trumpet, Wednesday 4/16. Andrew Vogt/sax, Friday 4/18. Mary Buirgy/voice, Saturday 4/19. Any discussion regarding jazz at the Bistro will be a heated one!

Mark

4/2/2008

Spring time in Colorado has never been more fun. I have a song called “Reluctant Spring” (a friend commented that the title sounds like a tempramental deodorant soap)…but NO it’s just describing our spunky, moody flip-floppy, diverse spring weather that swing’s from warm glow to snow globe in ten minutes or were those seconds. Spring – like jazz can turn on a dime (to coin a phrase) but this is no time to be confined to quarters when we have the fresh cent of a jazz buck to track through the penny pasta point of no refund. It’s good that change is good!

• Wednesday 4/2 (7:30-10:30) Jay’s features the jazz of The Monster Trux Trio (Raynes/drums, Barnhart/bass & Sloniker/piano) with special guest Jim Franzen/sax.
• Thursday 4/3 Jay’s Jazz Bistro Lounge fits the bill for the fine tun-age of Gene Libbea/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano (7-10:30).
• Friday 4/4 (8:30-11:30) Jazz @ Jay’s features: Peter Sommer/sax, Marty Kenney/bass and Mark(s) Raynes & Sloniker/drums & piano. This band even plays the spare changes, when they’re on a roll!
• Saturday 4/5 (8:30-11:30) The Jazzers @ Jay’s (Billy Hundley/voice, Marty Rein/bass & Mark Sloniker/piano) cash in, sell out and nickel and dime “Fittycent” centlessly…you got to give them credit for that. Everyone is invited to put in their $0.02

You’ll get a charge out of what’s coming up: Wednesday 4/9 features Kevin Whalen/trumpet. Friday 4/11 features Ryan Fourt/guitar. Saturday 4/12 feartures Colleen Crosson/voice. Friday 4/18 features Andrew Vogt/sax. Saturday 4/19 features Mary Buirgy/voice. What a fair fare!

Mark (Henny Penny) Sloniker….’better catch some jazz before the sky “you know whats”…

3/27/2008

Okay, we have some fine spring jazz for your listening pleasure at Jay’s Bistro. In honor of spring, all horn players must play their horns with tulips. The stand-up bass player rose to this occasion and the guitarist is no pansy either. We won’t pedal any of the cheap stuff or soil anyone’s reputation. This is jazz you can dig on without digging up any dirt on anyone or my name is mud. And, even though Chris wrote a lovely anthem, we think it our duty to keep Chris’- Anthem-Mum until we get to the root of the…and if these puns don’t seem to be growing on you, then weed rather not be pulling anything on you, stringing you along or asking you how you’ve bean. Lettuce rejoice more-over in the knowing that fertilizer is our friend, and if we want to get the full poop on the situation, then it is not a waste of time to bury the hatchet and cease any further cutting remarks. After all, this could stem into something…

• Thursday 3/27 Jay’s Bisto brings you the fine guitar-man-ship of Mike Davis with Mark Sloniker/piano 7:30-10pm
• Friday 3/28 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) Trumpeter, Kevin Whalen is joined by Mark Raynes/drums and Michael Buccino/bass and Sloniker/keys to perform some really cool jazz!!!
• Saturday 3/29 at Jay’s (8:30-11:30) = Wendy Fopeano/voice, Roger Barnhart/bass and Mark Sloniker at the bloomin’ piano.
• Friday 4/04/08 features Peter Sommer/sax. Saturday April 5 features Billy Hundley/voice. Saturday 4/12 features Colleen Crosson/voice.

Coloado’s fickle spring weather can get rough so if you need me, I’ll be garden the flowers!

Mark

3/21/2008

“Hear’s” a quit heads up for some cool jazz this week end and BEYOND…
• Tonight, Friday 3/21 Jazz @ Jay’s (8:30-11:30) featuring Guitar-man, Bard Hoff, Bass Man/Gene Libbea, Mark Raynes on drums and Mark Sloniker at the piano…a great way to wind down that wind and catch wind of a tightly wound but not wounded combo (but not a sandwich with fries and a drink).
• Tomorrow, Saturday 3/22 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) features the Return of Hugh Ragin/trumpet after a year’s absence with Roger Barnhart/bass and Mark Sloniker at the piano. This band has been banned by the faint of heart but not by the haint of f---- (speaking of wind) we promise not to raise a stink…

Next Week…Ron Cottingham joins up with the Monster Trux Trio, Wednesday 3/26. Mike Davis, Mark Sloniker Duo do a Duover by popular demand on Thursday 3/27. Kevin Whalen/trumpet joins Mark Sloniker Trio for fun on Friday 3/28. Wendy Fopeano joins Sloniker and Friends for fun and far out fugal frolicking on Saturday 3/29.

Happy Spring!

Mark

3/6/2008

Well, Daylight Savings looks to yield a light gain as we close out this first quarter. Although all gains will appear late in the day and the House of The Rising Sun will be left in the black, as if foreclosed upon by that darkest of darkness, occurring just before the dawn (which will be an hour late if you haven’t gotten my making light of the time change by now)…well then set your watches with this.

If you want my two cents about time “change”…they got the spin all wrong on daylight savings. Just as we are gradually seeing a modest net gain in the early returns (to hell with the bulls and the bears…the roosters are UP!), they (being the time change charlatans), like a maniacal Machiavellian mob of mortgage mad meanies, take from the poor early morning risers and give to the rich, warm, late afternoon ne’er-do-well fair weather friends, already basking in solar inside trading. In other words, IT’S THE MORNING WHEN WE NEED THE LIGHT (calm down Mark). The afternoon is already seeing brighter futures. Ever since “daylight savings” was invented in 3,692 B.C. by Ray Lender, the planet’s been on “tilt”. Ray, who also invented the Electoral College, the Dictatorial grammar school AND the Gubernatorial State of Disrepair, is rumored to have helped design human knees, the tax system, and health care.

I say we sell daylight savings even if it puts us in the red…let’s let Mother Nature take back what was hers all along – after all, where daylight is concerned – well the sky’s the limit and a new bright idea may be just beyond the horizon! Jazz will make light of everything in the following times and places:

• Thursday 3/6 Jay’s Bistro (7-10:30) Ron Cottingham/guitar and Mark Sloniker/piano trip the (day) light fantastic with a (sun) set of jazz
• Friday 3/7 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) Guitar man Ryan Fourt plays the daylights out of his guitar, Mark Raynes beats the drum slowly, Marty Kenney walks the bass low(ly) and Mark Sloniker (always in the dark) saves time during the rests!
• Saturday 3/8 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) Billy Hundley, sings the spheres into their orbits, Gene Libbea, plays circles around Sloniker, who moons all concerned.
• Wednesday 3/12 Jay’s (7:30-10:30) Monster Trux Trio with special guest Andrew Vogt/sax!
• Saturday 3/15 Jay’s (8:30-11:30) Colleen Crosson/sings a little “light” music with Marty Rein/bass and Sloniker/piano

Just like the sun, the music above will be a series of beautiful sets!

Ciao, Mark

2/14/2008

Well this week, I have heard from so many of you in regard to lefties and righties etc. I hope I can do justice to all the e-mails sent my way - I may need a hand. This latest piece of info certainly took me by surprise. In the 2002 election, Ross Perot, George Bush Sr. and Bill Clinton were (and I guess still are) all lefties. Many e-mails informed me that “you” throw with your left but bat with your right or write with your right but golf left handed or cut right handed but paste left handed. My bass player friend “Marty” questioned what left or right handed guitar playing was anyhow because it’s the other hand that is really doing the more complex job! Piano playing is similar in nature.

In the end, I guess I got to hand it to you – we are rightly left with a handsome mixture of duo dominant dexterities, delivering us from divisive dualities into the delightful domain of diversity. When the right hand knows (and appreciates) what the left hand is doing we become undefeatable. But let’s save de-feet for next week when more, I’m sure will be handed down to us.

• Wednesday 2/13 Jay’s Bistro (7:30-10:30) features Monster Trux Trio (Raynes, Barnhart & Sloniker) with special guest Mary Buirgy/voice.
• Thursday 2/14 Jay’s Bistro celebrates Valentine’s Day with a solo piano play-athon of 4.5 hours of only songs with the word “love” in them (more or less) – featuring yours truly on the piano. Cupid will be turning pages (6-10:30).
• Friday 2/15 Jazz @ Jay’s features Kevin Whalen/trumpet, Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker/piano. This is one fine set of cats, playing from the heart of jazz into the art of jazz (8:30-11:30).
• Saturday 2/16 Jay’s welcomes Songstress Colleen Crosson with Gene Libbea/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano (8:30-11:30).

Upcoming…James Anderson/violin Friday 2/22. Mary Buirgy/voice Saturday 2/23. Peter Sommer/sax Friday 2/29

Either way, I hope a Great Week is on hand for you!

Mark

2/6/2008

I noticed the other day at a televised debate that Barack Obama is a south paw. Likewise, at another presidential debate, John McCain was writing “south paw” as well. What an interesting situation it would be if two lefties were squaring off for the “highest office in the land”. As a lefty myself, I notice these things. Other lefties catch it too! After all we’ve suffered through…like no left handed butter knives or mustache cups…only righty scissors in kindergarten…the word for left in Latin is “sinister” and in French it’s “gauche” (and I have probably misspelled that word because of my “other” brain dominance). How gauche can I get!

Well fellow lefties: we’ve come a long way from sinister or gauche or being fed to the wolves or forced in schools to become righties…and just as soon as we take the oval office, we’re forcing everyone to be lefties…well for at least an hour or two…just so they can see what it feels like. Then, just as soon as we’ve lost all our rights, we’ll demand our rights back because in reality, right handed or left handed - neither’s bad! It’s those under handed people we need to reckon with. No playing softball with them! Just remember – vote left! After all, two wrongs don’t make a right, but three lefts do! (think about it)!

Wednesday 2/6 Jay’s Bistro (7:30-10:30) Marty Kenney/left bass…and forward march, Mark Raynes/great drums – hands down, Mark Sloniker (99% of all piano players are both handed) and special guest (what does he mean by “special”) sax man, Andrew Vogt!

• Thursday 2/7 Jay’s Bistro (7-10:30) Ron Cottingham/handy on guitar and Mark Sloniker (unhand that man) on piano.
• Friday 2/8 Jay’s (8:30-11:30) A first-hand-account of fine jazz: Ryan Fourt/guitar, Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/hand drums and Mark Sloniker/handy man with a high wrist factor!
• Saturday 2/9 Jay’s (8:30-11:30) Billy Hundley/great vocals…you got to hand it to him, Dr. Forest Greenough/bass (with the hands of a doctor…no, really) and Mark Sloniker, raising his right hand and swearing his attitude is not “defeatist” (or heavy handed) in nature!

Come down! You’ll be in good hands, we promise!

Mark (Hans Christian Anderson) Sloniker

Coming soon: Kevin Whalen/trumpet Friday 2/15. Colleen Crosson/voice Saturday 2/16. James Anderson/violin Friday 2/22. Mary Buirgy Saturday 2/23. Peter Sommer/sax 2/29.

1/30/2008

Dear E-Friends – Since I inadvertently sent this out on Colleen’s e-mail the first time, I didn’t want there to be any confusion, so I’m sending it again, from me! Sorry for duplicates! I DID NOT write this one (“Some Sad News”). But I wish I had…it was forwarded to me by Dave. Thanks Dave, this is really sweet, and I certainly got a RISE out of it!

Some Sad News
Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours. Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions. Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes. If this made you smile for even a brief second, please rise to the occasion and take time to pass it on and share that smile with someone else who may be having a crumby day and kneads it. If you did get a rise out of that and don’t want to loaf around… come hear some really cookin’ jazz…we’ll play an extra long drum ROLL in honor of PDB tonight! It’s the yeast we can do.

• Wednesday (tonight) 1/30 Jay’s Bistro hosts our very own Monster Trux Trio (Mark Raynes, Marty Kenney & Sloniker) with special guest, guitar guru Bard Hoff. I moved to Fort Collins 20 plus years ago to join a band with Bard and we toured all over the U.S. and Canada and played some cool venues like opening for Bob James at Red Rocks and Pat Metheny at Toronto Jazz Festival. It was quite a hoot! Join us if you can (7:30-10:30).
• Thursday 1/31 Jay’s 6:30-10:30 I think or hope that Gene Libbea is coming by to play some bass (maybe I’d better call him)!? Come by and see if I was right.
• Friday 2/1 Jay’s (8:30-11:30) Andrew Vogt/saxsational horn man joins Monster Trux Trio (same cats as Wednesday)
• Saturday 2/2 Jay’s (8:30-11:30) Another long time friend, Wendy Fopeano/voice joins new-time-friend Mike Bucino/bass and me/piano for a fine evening of song!

In honor of Ground Hog Day we will play “The Shadow of Your Smile”.

Other February Dates Include: Andrew Vogt/sax on Wednesday, 2/6. Ryan Fourt/guitar on Friday, 2/8. Mary Buirgy/voice on Wednesday, 2/13. Kevin Whalen/trumpet on Friday 2/15. Colleen Crosson/voice on Saturday 2/16. James Anderson/violin on Friday, 2/22.

As always, Thanks for Listening! mark

1/15/2008

Did you hear the one about this guy who is late for the most important meeting of his life and he’s circling the block of the building that the meeting is to take place in and it’s morning rush hour traffic in down town New York City. The guy’s whole career and future is riding on this meeting and he has just two minutes to park his car and get in there or the whole thing will go down the tubes. So he yell’s out “Dear God if you get me a parking place I swear to you, that I will lead my life from this day forward truly devoted to you! I will always be honest and generous to the poor and kind to every soul I meet and donate huge amounts to charities and never cheat…” And right then as he rounds the corner, miraculously, some one pulls out of a spot right in front of him, right by the doors he needs to go into to make his meeting and secure his future. He pulls into the parking place and yells, “Never mind. I found one!”

If you were looking for some really fine jazz as if your whole life depended on it….you might try looking here;

• Wednesday 1/16 (7:30-10:30) Jay’s Bistro - The first set is Monster Trux Trio with Mark Raynes/drums, Roger Barnhart/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano. The second set features sax-maniac, Andrew Vogt. We will, we will rock You! Wednesday nights are generally less crowded than Fridays and Saturdays, and a great time to celebrate that mid-week Miles marker.
• Thursday 1/17 (6:30-10:30) Jay’s Bistro - Mark Sloniker/piano will be joined by %*^@$*(%&$&%______________________________we interrupt this program to @*&$#^#*&$

And now back to our regularly scheduled program;

• Friday 1/18 (8:30-11:30) Trumpet troubadour (and current director of the Greeley UNC Jazz Festival), Kevin Whalen will join Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and Mark Sloniker /piano. We will feature trumpet tributes to Miles Davis, Lee Morgan, Louis Armstrong and Clifford Brown.
• Saturday 1/19 (8:30-11:30) Colleen Crosson/voice, Marty Kenney “bass prodigy” and Mark Sloniker “piano probably” will explore some Gershwin, some Cole Porter, some Rodgers and Hart, and some Tom Waits (not necessarily in that [or any] order). Colleen’s got some great new material and I promise to scat sing and play piano at the same time on Take Five if you find me a parking place in the next two minutes.
• Wednesday 1/23 features Marty Kenney/bass.
• Friday 1/25 features Grant Gordy/guitar.
• Saturday 1/26 features Mike Davis/guitar.
• Friday 2/1 features Andrew Vogt/sax
• Friday 2/8 features Ryan Fourt/guitar.

As far as parking places go: you’re on your own…or are you?

Thanks for Listening! Mark

1/8/2008

It must be an election year because two of my favorite primary colors are being given assigned seating on a map looking strangely like US. Happy New Year by the way, and I don’t want to hit you with any off-color humor too soon (oh heck, why not - it’s already January 8th…this year’s practically shot), but I couldn’t help think…How did the republican party get the color red and how did the democratic party get the color blue and do other parties have their own primary colors too?!

Did these parties choose their color or were they assigned or prearranged to have these colors somewhere in the preamble to the constitution? Or perhaps this is a gray area…or worse yet, perhaps it was a plot by the media to try and get republicans to look “communist” or even worse, “sunburned” and the democrats to look “sad” (eg “the blues”) or even worse “true”.

Next, do the “two parties” possess these colors in perpetuity (you didn’t think I knew that word did you?), or do they pay an annual tax, say, to the Crayola (sounds like “payola”) Corporation? Unless of course these colors have their headquarters outside of the red/blue map area and can therefore give those taxes the “brush-off”.

If a color gets caught bending the light can it get a prism sentence? Are either of these colors affected by other colors (say green for instance), that could make things a bit more colorful (if you want to hear the black and the white of it…)?

I’m thinking of starting a new party that would require two colors – black and blue – and we would decide everything via mosh-pit dancing. And I think we would have a huge impact on the country and each other. When you make an impression on someone in a mosh-pit…it’s a lasting one…until then, why not catch some tunes that are red hot AND true blue…why not…??

• Wednesday 1/9 Jay’s Bistro - Our young bass friend from Alaska (via UNC), Marty Kenney, joins Mark Raynes (Montana) on drums, Ron Cottingham (Colorado) on guitar and Mark Sloniker (planet Zolton) on piano (7:30-10:30). This is monster trux mania in its most colorful configuration.
• Thursday 1/10 Jay’s welcomes Gene Libbea/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano and some special guests who will add color to the state of things!
• Friday 1/11 Jay’s jumps for joy with Andrew Vogt/sax, Marty Kenney/bass and Marks Raynes and Sloniker coloring outside the box (at least the 8-pack).
• Saturday 1/12 Jay’s greets Mary Buirgy/vocals with Gene Libbea/LaBass and Mark Sloniker/LaTiDo (even though he’s never Fa).

Upcoming gigs feature: Andrew Vogt Wed. 1/16. Kevin Whalen Fri. 1/18. Colleen Crosson Sat. 1/19. Grant Gordy Fri. 1/25

See ya there!

Mark

1/3/08

I just learned on “Star Date” that we are actually closer (by millions of miles) to the sun this time of year than during the summer season. Proximity does not give us warmth…it is rather, having a good angle on things that provides us with these seasons which add color and in the case of winter, character to our global giddy-up! Did the sun get a touch overzealous in her plucky playfulness of planetary pinball; that “tilt” causing our current tilt, hence causing - VOILA’! – four fabulous seasons?? Perhaps my summer-ization is too simple for you to fall for…I’ll spring it on you later)!!! But seriously…

A good spin on things seems to be the rule these days, and what a good thing and marvelous coincidence that the earth spins one good and full turn every twenty four hours (how amazing is that!). If the earth wasn’t the good spin doctor that she is, we might be left in the dark, or even worse - stuck permanently in the day, with the sun making light of us 24-7 (except that there would be no “twenty-four-seven” to experience 24-7 in) AND Cole Porter couldn’t or wouldn’t have written his famous song, unless he was traveling twenty fo- oops I mean traveling ad infinitum on Concord Jets (which don’t even fly anymore) ‘round an un-tilted un-spinning planet…can you say bbbbooorrrrrrriiiiinnnnnnggggggggggg!

The longer the night, the better the jazz. So you better grab some now ‘cause things seem to be getting lighter every day (and night)….

• Tonight, Thursday 1/3 Jay’s Bistro features music in the darker keys (a minor improvement) with Forest Greenough/bass and Mark Sloniker/piano (7-10:30)
• Friday 1/4 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) Peter Sommer/sax, Erik Applegate/bass, Mark Raynes/drums and Sloniker/piano. This is a fine quartet playing all their sets after the sun sets (as opposed to the swing sets).
• Saturday 1/5 Jay’s Bistro (8:30-11:30) Billy Hundley/voice with Gene Libbea/bass and Sloniker/piano. Super fine standards and some really fun R & B to boot!
• Thursday 1/10 features Gene Libbea on bass.
• Friday 1/11 features Andrew Vogt on sax.
• Saturday 1/12 features Mary Buirgy/voice.
• Wednesday 1/16 Andrew Vogt is back.
• Friday 1/18 features Kevin Whalen on trumpet.
• Saturday 1/19 features Colleen Crosson/voice.
• Friday 1/25 features Grant Gordy on guitar. Every Wednesday finds the Monster Trux Trio with a special guest 7:30-10:30. If you’re heading for Jay’s Bistro, you’re getting warmer!

Thanks for Listening, Mark

Mark Sloniker fan page on Facebook Mark Sloniker at ReverbNation